Things people say..

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KristiA's picture
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Things people say..

hello!

We got back on Saturday (I will do a trip report, had an AMAZING time), only one thing really got to me this trip.

We were at DHS and sitting for Beauty and the Beast. The family behind us must have had 5 small children. The Grandpa was being really good and trying to stop the children from bumping and kicking the people in front of them, which was my hubby, myself and another couple. After about 10 or so minutes, the mother (making an assumption) states very loudly, They are at Walt Disney World, if they cant handle kids, maybe they shouldn't be here.

I found that pretty offensive. Just because we are at WDW, does not mean that we have to bring kids with us. I asked my son if he wanted to come on this trip and he declined. I wanted to say something, but didnt. The Grandpa leaned over and kept apologizing.

Okay, that's my one gripe for the trip. Now to start working on the trip report. yay :yay:

cdub's picture
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Welcome back! Glad you had a good trip!

The attitude you describe is pretty rife at Disney World and irritates me endlessly. We even had a CM say something to that effect to us once. People like to rationalize their misbehaving so they decide that they get to make the "rules" of who Disney World is for. We just ignore them and figure that having to wrangle misbehaving children is it's own punishment. Smile

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cdub you are right but the problem is that the "wranglers" are too few and far between. waiting

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caitiesus's picture
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That really bugs me! The kids are bad when the PARENTS are bad. Another example of this was when we were at Fridays last night. One couple had three kids who were quiet, well-behaved, and polite. At one point the youngest started crying (she was probably two) and the parents and her older brothers started telling her jokes and she stopped

The next table over there were 3 kids and 3 adults and two of the kids were loud, whining and screaming. The mom decided to get out her iPhone and started playing loud music and games to get her kid to be quiet, which was more irritating than the kids being loud.

And guess what? Us being annoyed was not our fault since we were at Fridays, a place where families go. If a CM at Disney ever said something like that to me, I would complain!

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I have no problem telling the parents or the kids to knock it off lol.. maybe it's because I work at the Disney Store, I constantly have to address kids and their behavior.
When I'm at the store, a good stern, "Can I help you find something??" works for kids about.. 8 and up... if they are younger I usually tell them, "it's the Disney Store! There's no crying allowed in here!" or sometimes I simply ask them, "what's wrong??"
Usually they are so shy or so embarassed they quiet down.

Now, when I"m out in public.. lol.. if the parents arent looking, I make faces, grit my teeth at the kid.. and they usually are so startled they stop. If the parents are right there, like in Kristia's case, I would have asked the kid directly to please stop hitting me. If the parents had an issue I would have just replied to them that I just figured since they hadnt done anything about it they must have thought it was ok. Most people are really shocked at being so forward with them.

Now.. if I had overheard that comment??? forget it.. I would have turned around and I would have said the exact same sentence to them.. if YOU cant handle YOUR kids, maybe you shouldnt come to WDW.... and depending on my mood, I might add that they're acting like brats.
lol..

Like I always say, "If it werent for the people and kids.. WDW, DL, and my job would be perfect!"

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but I must add.. I get pretty cranky and I have trouble holding my tongue.. (since I have to do it at work lol)

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People are badly behaved in Vegas too, and they're adults, and they think it's excusable.

If you insist on being out in society then I insist you conduct yourself as if you aren't the only person there.

While I don't agree with the sentiment that there are places at DISNEY that kids don't belong, I do agree there is certain behavior never appropriate or that must be modified. Screaming on a roller coaster? duh. screaming at dinner? duh.

sometimes kids are excited and I try to ignore my boring old adult self, or even engage with them, but sometimes, like adults, they're just pillocks.

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thefirebuilds wrote:
People are badly behaved in Vegas too, and they're adults, and they think it's excusable.

If you insist on being out in society then I insist you conduct yourself as if you aren't the only person there.

While I don't agree with the sentiment that there are places at DISNEY that kids don't belong, I do agree there is certain behavior never appropriate or that must be modified. Screaming on a roller coaster? duh. screaming at dinner? duh.

sometimes kids are excited and I try to ignore my boring old adult self, or even engage with them, but sometimes, like adults, they're just pillocks.

lol.. I was looking for the "like" button for this post!

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thefirebuilds wrote:
People are badly behaved in Vegas too, and they're adults, and they think it's excusable.

If you insist on being out in society then I insist you conduct yourself as if you aren't the only person there.

While I don't agree with the sentiment that there are places at DISNEY that kids don't belong, I do agree there is certain behavior never appropriate or that must be modified. Screaming on a roller coaster? duh. screaming at dinner? duh.

sometimes kids are excited and I try to ignore my boring old adult self, or even engage with them, but sometimes, like adults, they're just pillocks.

Great post and welcome! I always try to give them the benefit of the doubt and just think they're having a bad day, but I think you're right that some people are just going to be ill-behaved no matter what.

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KristiA -- Aw, man! I hate it when things like that happen. I'm so sorry there was a less-than-magical experience on your trip sad I'm really looking forward to your report! Did the kids quiet down when the show started, or was it just as bad?

Vette -- So true!

Caitie -- Jokes! I'll have to remember that one!

DD -- I wish I could see some of the faces you make at the kids laugh

thefirebuilds -- Welcome! Love the quote "Screaming on a roller coaster? duh. screaming at dinner? duh."

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I appreciate that y'all make the distinction between the well behaved and not-so, without assuming that all children are little Pains Smile! As one of the resident mommies-of-small-kids-who-also-appreciates-Disney-without-them, I can see both sides of it. Sometimes, for love nor money nor Cheerios, you just CAN'T get them to cooperate. But poor behaviour should never be excused, and if I can't get them to quiet down (and honestly, this has never ever happened to me - I'm seriously blessed with kiddos that love the shows) then I would leave. Because thefirebuilds hit the nail on the head: it's all about respect. And my experience is no less important or unimportant than yours. In fact, that one magical trip to Jiko last month? I almost told the family with the screaming children right below us to KNOCK IT OFF.

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KristiA's picture
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Admin - they quieted down once the show started.

I do understand small kids get antsy, mine was once small too. Most of the time, it does not bother me at all! I was excited too. I just thought the comment was uncalled for. No of us ever turned around or said anything.

I should get the trip report started tonight. Back at work after a week off and its time to play catch up!

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Can't wait to see the trip report!

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I'm a 2nd grade teacher and I correct kids all day..lots of times I have trouble holding my tongue in public..I try because it's not really my place there but I do give my teacher look more than I should.
Haha!

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Wow.... that takes a lot of... umm... guts for someone to say that. I agree with all the comments... especially the one who said that just because your at Disney, doesnt give the kids a pass to treat others badly. And that does come down to parents not behaving. If my kids were acting that way... I would have apologized, and they would be back in our room and done for the day. Not basically encourage it.

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We were at the end of a simular statement once. We were eating dinner at The Cape May Cafe. Sitting at the table next to us were a family with 3 small children. They were jumping around all during dinner. Truthfully they were not even bothering us nor were we really paying attention to them. However towards the end of the meal the father came over and said "Can I ask you something? Why are you here if you do not have children?" We told him that we do have children but they were in college and we were there for our 25th anniversary. Then he says "why in the world would you chose to come here for that?" We simply answered "because we do not have children we have to bring with us".

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Omistars. People have NO sense. As if having children were some kind of REQUIREMENT for going to Disney. Can't you just see it now?

Security Guard: "Oh, Sorry, ma'am. Can't let you in without a kid."

On the other hand, it almost sounds like Dad was saying - "I wouldn't be here if I had a choice, surrounded by all these kids. Why are you here willingly?" Poor Guy.

Whoa, I think I just got mad AND felt sorry for this guy at the same time.

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We have on the other hand, complimented parents on how well behaved their children are.

We were in Tony's for dinner a few trips back and on one side was a family of like 5 ( Grandparents, parents & 1 child) with one child about 6 who was screaming and yelling, jumping, running around the restaurant and the parents pretty much didn't care. The grandparents chime "stop it Johnny" once in a while, but that was it. The parents would grab him, sit him in the chair, and 2 seconds later he was off again.

On the other side was a younger couple with 2 little girls, like 4 & 5 years old. They were just sitting there pretty as can be all through dinner. I had to go up to the young couple before we left and tell them how impressed I was that the girls were so good and well behaved and that they should be very proud of them. They said "We are, and thank you!" (all said loud enough that "THE OTHER FAMILY" could here us.)

Just got to do that sometimes!

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scrappy wrote:
We were at the end of a simular statement once. We were eating dinner at The Cape May Cafe. Sitting at the table next to us were a family with 3 small children. They were jumping around all during dinner. Truthfully they were not even bothering us nor were we really paying attention to them. However towards the end of the meal the father came over and said "Can I ask you something? Why are you here if you do not have children?" We told him that we do have children but they were in college and we were there for our 25th anniversary. Then he says "why in the world would you chose to come here for that?" We simply answered "because we do not have children we have to bring with us".

Wow? Seriously? That is just insane. Obviously that guy would only come to Disney with kids.

This is a little bit more on the friendly side, but what scrappy just said, it reminded me of it.

I bought myself an iPad before we went to Disney so that I can load it up with movies for the kids. And if that wasnt enough, I could turn the wifi on my phone and they can either watch TV from home with our Slingbox, or watch something on Netflix. I did this in hopes of long lines, waiting for dinner, and whatever we may need it for. Well... I put all of the Toy Story's on it of course and my daughter who was 1 and a half at the time was watching it while waiting for food when we were at The Wave. A table behind us had a little boy, and he kept watching Toy Story, and it was obvious because he had to turn around to watch it. I sure didnt mind, but I could tell the parents were trying to get there son to not watch it. The parents then apologized to us for there son watching it, and I told them its not a problem at all. No biggie... if he would like to continue to watch it, then it would be no problems. They then went on to say this was the best he has behaved on the trip and definitely for dinner. It gave me warm fuzzies to hear that.

So I guess... buy an iPad if you want your younger children to behave... heh

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Mase - that would actually really annoy me...and did last week. They had a phone movie or TV show or something with sound on and it disturbed the rest of the people in the section.

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caitiesus wrote:
Mase - that would actually really annoy me...and did last week. They had a phone movie or TV show or something with sound on and it disturbed the rest of the people in the section.

We dont have it blaring. We just have it loud enough for the kids to hear it. Our talking at the table is louder than it.

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You can also roll with headphones. Kids wear them all the time anyway anymore. Pretty soon we'll have implanted ones! I'd definitely take low-volume iPad noise over rambunctious kids.

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Hmm, I guess I'm an old fogey now, because I will sometimes say something to other people's children. When I grew up (in the 70's), I fully expected to be reprimanded by any observing adult when I was in public - and therefore rarely misbehaved. My adult admission costs more than little Johnny's - why is his experience more valuable than mine? Don't get me wrong - I like kids, and am very excited about taking my niece later this fall. (She'll be 9, the last year one can wear a costume outside of the Halloween party. We'll be in the park for two days. I've gotten her 3 outfits! oh boy ...)

I fully blame the parents. It's up to parents to know what their child is and is not capable of. Two year olds cannot handle Disney from dawn to dusk commando style - they just can't! And kids get over-heated faster than adults - please hydrate your children. Oh, and parents should be parents, not friends ... if you relent and allow your 5 year old daughter to wear flimsy jelly shoes, please please please pack some socks and tennis shoes. (I can still see that little girl's ruby-red achilles tendon shining under her Gabrielle dress ... one time I didnt speak up that I wish I had!) And I don't care how much you paid to rent that stroller ... it does not give you the right to push it into the back of my sweetheart's legs at one of the viewing spots in AK. And unless the kid begged and pleaded to have a picture taken with whatever character, do you really think that line is worth it? (Some of those kids look SO miserable ... I always feel sorry for them.)

So, I guess it's not really so much about the misbehaving kids, as it is the willfully lackluster parents. (Every kid has a bad day now & then, as does every parent. But just a little bit of planning can make everyone's day so much nicer.)

I, too, have complimented parents of well-behaved children. I think both the kids & the parents deserve the recognition. Ohhh, that'll be a goal for my next trip ... see how many families I can compliment! Last trip we gave a few pins to a well behaved young girl at Epcot ... we over-heard what type of pin she was trading for, but since there's a 2 pin limit she wasn't able to trade for everything she wanted. I think karma already more than paid us back - twice that trip complete strangers gave us fast passes they had decided not to use. So, we owe some more kids random acts of kindness.

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Heya Suz! Welcome to the boards!

I suppose these days people are more likely to reprimand the parents than the kids.

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Its true though. Most parents dont want to be the bad guy. Especially at Disney.

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It's also confirmation bias. You notice all the kids that misbehave and don't notice all the ones that don't. Of course some of them misbehave so spectacularly...

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Brad wrote:
It's also confirmation bias. You notice all the kids that misbehave and don't notice all the ones that don't. Of course some of them misbehave so spectacularly...

Haha - excellent point! Some take it to the level of performance art for sure!

I say...and this is hard to do...that I try and remember to take a deep breath, and cut everyone some slack, and not let anyone ruin my fun. Because before I had children, I thought anyone pushing a stroller was the Devil mad . And now that I'm a stroller pusher, I fight being run over by Non Stroller People who seem to be annoyed with me for having one. Perspective has, for me I know, played a big part in things.

And when all else fails...I like the suggestion above to make faces at the little darlings angelwings

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I blame the parents for alot of it too, though.

We were at an aquarium recently. I was standing a foot back from the glass clearly reading the information about the fish in the tank. A dad picked his 6ish year old daughther up, pushed me back and stood in front of me.

I said, "excuse me, but she's old enough to wait a minute, I was here first."

He yelled at me and said "kids come first, what's your problem lady?"

Um, what? That's not something to teach your child.

What about patience, politeness, the ability to wait clamly in line? Kids learn what parents teach them.

(He then pushed me out of the way 2 more times that day until I pushed him back and stomped on his foot. Come on people!)

Growing up we didn't have ipads or dvd's to watch in restaurants or online. Our parents gave us crayons or sang songs with us and weren't afraid to repremand us if we didn't behave. If my sister and i acted up in line to ride Dumbo, we'd be yanked from the line, no questions asked.

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katrina1122 wrote:
(He then pushed me out of the way 2 more times that day until I pushed him back and stomped on his foot. Come on people!)

And I hope you had stiletto high heels on to make it count. laugh

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Oh sometimes I feel like an old lady when I think about "kids today", but I can't remember my parents ever letting my brother and I behave terribly in public. It just wasn't happening.
And honestly as a non-parent I'm ok with kids, I understand that they get tired and cranky, and aren't always perfect. What gets me is when I see them just being wildly out of control, and the parents act like this is normal.

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As a teacher myself, I have given the teacher look to some kids in public before.

As a teacher, I'm also 1000% convinced that misbehaving children are SOLELY due to bad parenting. Case in point, what happened to Caitie and me on our anniversary cruise (a story I think I've told before on here). We were at the drill, and this kid in front of us, maybe 3 years old, would NOT stop screaming because he didn't want to wear the little plastic bracelet kids need to wear. The parents picked him up, but that was about it. We couldn't hear anything that was going on. Finally, I started talking to him, explaining to him how the bracelet was magic and helped everyone have a good time on the trip. He started to calm down as I talked to him...until his idiot mother said "He's telling you some story, isn't he?"

There went the screams again. It took another father (the kids' father was as useless as the mother) making goofy faces to get the kid quiet. The drill ended soon after, but we'd missed the whole thing by that point.

I'm certainly not above telling kids to get quiet, and if someone had made that comment about being at Disney without kids to me, I probably would have shot back with a "why are you here with kids who can't behave?" But then, I apparently like to get myself in trouble.

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