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Spook's picture
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Joined: 04/27/2012
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Kristen K. wrote:
Spook wrote:
Didn't something similar happen with VelcroPooh?

From my investigation, what happened with VelcroPooh was a big misunderstanding that blew up very quickly. The timing of a post she made clashed with the timing of a post a moderator made and she felt like she was being called out in public, which she was not.

Moderating a message board is a very difficult job, especially as they grow from a small board to a larger more active board. Online communications can often misrepresent the original intent of the poster. All forums get growing pains, and sometimes personalities clash, but the job of a moderator and community manager is to try and keep everything on an even keel while maintaining the values and rules of the forums. Some websites have an "anything goes" policy, others take a more "my way or the highway" stance on their forums. Walt Disney World for Grown-ups does the best we can to keep in the middle ground.

The other moderators and I try very had to keep an eye on things and manage the conversations when we feel that they are running off the track, however we're not the thought police, and the three of us can't see what's being said in private. That means that if someone doesn't tell us that there's a problem until they are ready to walk out the door - we just don't know. We try our best to keep each other advised when we hear rumblings or see trouble brewing, most things we can handle. Sometimes we have to bring in Brand & Admin for a more official presence and a deeper look at what happened - people have been asked to leave in the past, and it could happen in the future as well. We hope that doesn't happen though.

mickey The other thing to remember about Disney Message Boards is that they have a somewhat transient nature, which means that friends that drop off after their last vacations frequently come back again when they start planning another! I love it when old friends pop back in and let us know that they've started planning another great adventure. muchlove

Well I personally think (and I know I'm not alone here) that all you Moderators are doing a great job and really appreciate what you do. awesome

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Kristen, we think you do a great job! I am not on Facebook or Twitter or any other social media or online blogs. I do not post anywhere else. I just come here as Alicemouse said in her post to escape the real world and hang out with some genuinely lovely, interesting, intelligent people whose opinions I value - and of course have the same passion for Disney that I do.

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disneydoc's picture
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Great thread folks! I think we do have a special group here, and always room for new faces too.

Home late tonight from my trip - more to come. mickey

AND...great to hear from you Mase!!

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amy1989's picture
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I'm so sad the King Fergus & Mr Ferret are no longer with us - I used to look forward to logging in on a morning and seeing what was going on!!!

That being said I'm grateful for the people that are still around and even though I haven't met any of you (yet!!) I feel like you are part of an extended family who I can talk about Disney freely with!

Also moderators you do an amazing job!!!!

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OMG I totally didn't realise about KF, were the people bullying him here fully fledged WDWFGU members or old nasty members from the other forum who followed him? He shouldn't have to, but could he change his name or sign up with a new name to escape it? I miss his posts so much, I loved coming on each day and seeing a new thread started by him Smile

I know what its like to be cyber bullied Sad I had that before I found this place, well before this place and I were going steady and I was still tarting it about on other forums Wink in the special needs forum too of all places Shock it just goes to show that there is nastiness in all walks of life. I'm glad for this wonderful site though, I have always felt safe and wanted here Smile I'm sad that others haven't felt the same way though Sad

I know we share a love of Disney and so of course when there's no holiday to plan we duck out slightly, life gets in the way and it can be actually quite painful seeing others planning their trips while you have none in the pipeline, but hopefully we all come back when we are in full on plan mode and can ask questions and share our hints and tips Smile

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Our Very Merry 24 nighter Nov/Dec 15
Watson's go West May 15
The one with all the birthdays Oct 14 4 Big Birthdays and a Vow Renewal thrown in
The OMG trip June 14 30th Birthday present from the hubs
Girly trip March 14 A last min cheapy week
September 13 our first all DVC stay
TR May 2013 the last min bargain trip offsite
Oct 2012 TR with a cruise!big family trip featuring the beach club, AKL, the dream and a villa offsite
TR on a budget May - June 2011offsite condo
TR Sept - Oct 2010 big family trip in an offsite villa

designedbydisney's picture
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I wasn't posting when it happened because I was offline at the time in hospital. But it does make me sad I really though of king ferguson as a friend and our trips are the same date so we would talk planning together. I know some didn't 'get' but he has a great british humor. I hope I will bump in to h one day while in line for dole whip and his will be on me!

A forum takes all sorts of personalitys and I loved Velcropooh, ferguson and meferretts posts and topics. I do hope they find their way home soon

jhugo's picture
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That makes me so sad that people are getting bullied. I joined this site because everyone seemed so open and friendly. It worries me and makes me wonder who will be bullied and leave next? sad

MrHub's picture
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RobynPrincess wrote:
OMG I totally didn't realise about KF, were the people bullying him here fully fledged WDWFGU members or old nasty members from the other forum who followed him? He shouldn't have to, but could he change his name or sign up with a new name to escape it? I miss his posts so much, I loved coming on each day and seeing a new thread started by him Smile

Robyn, I'd rather not start opening that can of worms on the forum, lets just leave it at " the situation was dealt with by the staff". Those that chose to leave left on their own accord.

The biggest problems on a forum usually all start from misunderstanding because everyone reads things a little differently, and feelings and emotions are the hardest to read.

If anyone has a problem with another member, contact a Mod or Admin and things will be dealt with.

kathys's picture
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Kristen K first let me wish you luck today with your 2 extractions.
I can only imagine how hard it can be to try and keep everyone happy. It can be a thankless task from time to time am sure. But I do appreciate it. I do understand that once something is written it can never be taken back and also it can be misunderstood as you know I can say something is black and you say no it is gray. And we could be off and running over that. But all anyone can do is say they are sorry if they have said something wrong to upset someone else and if they can't do that same on them. Because maybe it wasn't that person intent to hurt someone's feelings but something you think is no big deal can be a big deal to someone else.
For an example I thought I had done something wrong on this site because it seemed like (2 examples..and I won't mention them here) MrHub made a comment right after my comment and I thought he was talking to me. So as an adult I sent him a private message to find out if I had done something wrong. And he wrote back and explained it to me so I was good.
So we need to appreciate this site (as I do) and all the hard work you all do. I may be a little quieter now and for a while as my next trip is over 3 years away so I won't have anything new to post but I may jump in at different times.

bighug to all of you and all that participate.

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Kristen K.'s picture
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MrHub wrote:

Robyn, I'd rather not start opening that can of worms on the forum, lets just leave it at " the situation was dealt with by the staff". Those that chose to leave left on their own accord.

Indeed he was offered many options to stay, but ultimately felt that it would be best for the board if he left. It was his choice. I am glad to see so many people saying how much they miss him, I always hope he's still reading in the background.

Miss Mikki's picture
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This thread has taken a totally unexpected turn! My intention when starting it was just to reminisce about some of the great members we'd like to see back here! I had no idea some had left for serious reasons. I thought, as Mr Hub wrote that they had just drifted off because maybe they didn't have any trips planned or were busy with life.

I hope no-one leaves because they fear being bullied after reading this thread. Put your trust in admin to deal with anything and let's get back to what we do best - talking about Disney - and sharing pixie dust and happy thoughts with each other!

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ScottFL's picture
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Too bad about The King - he had a unique curiosity that made for some interesting threads.

finngirl's picture
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This was the first forum I ever joined. I lurked at a few for a while, and decided I liked the 'tone' of this one the best. I really appreciate the mods even-handed approach - thanks for everything you do. Keeping up with the spam lately must be a full-time job!

I miss Jeff. It didn't feel like Christmas without photos of his decorations - I hope his life gets quieter, and he can come back more often. I miss Bella too - I'm still waiting for her to finish her last trip report - it was hilarious. And Joe, come back and post photos of your recent trips please.

I really like reading everyone's posts. I don't have a ticker up (still!!!), but get my Disney fix reading about everyone's plans, looking at your photos, etc. Some of you crack me up - you are a very witty group. biggrin

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MrHub's picture
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Miss Mikki wrote:
Put your trust in admin to deal with anything and let's get back to what we do best - talking about Disney - and sharing pixie dust and happy thoughts with each other!

Exactly!

Magic Mirror's picture
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stars stars stars
Let's talk Disney!
stars stars stars

RobynPrincess's picture
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MrHub wrote:
RobynPrincess wrote:
OMG I totally didn't realise about KF, were the people bullying him here fully fledged WDWFGU members or old nasty members from the other forum who followed him? He shouldn't have to, but could he change his name or sign up with a new name to escape it? I miss his posts so much, I loved coming on each day and seeing a new thread started by him Smile

Robyn, I'd rather not start opening that can of worms on the forum, lets just leave it at " the situation was dealt with by the staff". Those that chose to leave left on their own accord.

The biggest problems on a forum usually all start from misunderstanding because everyone reads things a little differently, and feelings and emotions are the hardest to read.

If anyone has a problem with another member, contact a Mod or Admin and things will be dealt with.

Ok MrHub. x

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Our Very Merry 24 nighter Nov/Dec 15
Watson's go West May 15
The one with all the birthdays Oct 14 4 Big Birthdays and a Vow Renewal thrown in
The OMG trip June 14 30th Birthday present from the hubs
Girly trip March 14 A last min cheapy week
September 13 our first all DVC stay
TR May 2013 the last min bargain trip offsite
Oct 2012 TR with a cruise!big family trip featuring the beach club, AKL, the dream and a villa offsite
TR on a budget May - June 2011offsite condo
TR Sept - Oct 2010 big family trip in an offsite villa

Magic Days's picture
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Posts: 601

So on that note DH is hinting big time to find out where he is going for his surprise. I'm so glad he doesn't read the forum and sticks to the news. The excitement is killing me. Friday is my birthday but my present will be his big reveal.

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I, too, appreciate the hard work of the moderators. It's not an easy task and definitely requires a lot of responsibilities and duties. And yes, it is understandable that people have busy lives outside the digital world so they may not have the time to come by the forums and that applies to all of us to an extent.

Something I wanted to touch on was that I remember mrhub said something way back when, about the people and the respect of the members that truly make the site what it is.

Having said that, I do feel that all of us as users have a moral and obligatory responsibility to not only be able and feel comfortable posting our thoughts or opinions but doing so in a way that is also respectful and civil about others' opinions, as well. One of the biggest beef I have with other forums is not the fact they are stating contrarian opinions or offer criticism, but rather, how they say those opinions. You can make points and a fair argument without coming off as being negative, snobbish, superior or think you know more and/or you're better than everyone else. Fortunately, I think a solid majority of us follow through with that. awesome

What leads to escalation, disagreement and hurt feelings is that pride and ego reigns supreme in the mind of the users and they feel the need to keep fighting until they "win the argument" so to speak. And the worst thing is that they never apologize with conviction and sincerity for their actions. They deny it and either say that person does not have thick skin or that person is a homer/hater. Feelings do get hurt and people leave because who would want to visit a forum where they don't feel comfortable? I mean, it's true internet miscommunication can happen anywhere but if we took a couple more minutes to glance over our posts before clicking the submit or post button and ensure we're not sending a mixed or unclear message and not post anything that is taboo, hurtful or offensive, then it would not eradicate miscommunication per say but it would certainly help immensely. But at any rate, if we can all learn to put our pride and ego aside for the sake of everyone involved and learn to agree to disagree politely and civilly while also staying in bounds of proper forum etiquette, we can make this forum a better place. I think as of now, we're doing a pretty solid job and let's keep it that way!

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So, going to give 'my 2 cents' (or 2p - pence) I don't post here often, sometimes I've double posted, messed up & don't even mention spelling auto-correction from my iPad, BUT this is a great place to be a member of. And it's the only, and I mean only place I'm online. Yes, no Facebook or Twitter etc. My DW is a member of different Disney forum/site, so we get to discuss posts and topics, even the people.

It's amazing how many people 'get' the joy or obsession of Disney. Last vacation we even meet another member, Mase in AKL on our last vacation.

Unfortunatley, life and work sometimes get in the way, but stealing a few minutes to read the posts & articles here really keep the Disney spirit in full flight.

There is such a diverse group of people who post here that it's never boring or tired, there's lots of fun and advice and sharing(enabling).

Also to Kirsten and the team, thanks for looking after the site and giving us all a place to have fun and enjoy ourselves.

Long live WDWforgrownups.

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My ears have been ringing off the hook! And my spidey sense making me sweat bullets! Now I know why.... laugh

Hi! You missed me! I feel loved. Or at least mildly liked. Nah, I feel loved muchlove

So yes! Busy as all get out. Did you know that owning a farm was ALOT of work?! It is. Add on my regular full time job and all the dang dr. appointments and physical therapy from the fall, and I got waaaay busy. On the plus side, I am indeed still alive!

I miss all the great conversations that happen here. Sorry I missed the drama (ok, maybe not) but always know that hubs VL and Kristen are doing their very very best to make this the most wonderful site on the interwebnetthing.

Just a few quick "What's New" things for now:

1. I am healed! Mostly. Cast is off and I am back to work full time. But I did have to have a follow,up,surgery on my wrist 2 weeks ago. Still not working right since the fall. Grr!

2. Joe and I officially celebrated our 1 year marriage anniversary list weekend! Yay us!

3. I have become the fresh new face of the local farmers market! Well not really, but I had my 5 seconds of semi-fame on Saturday. Stay tuned for my reality series pilot....

http://kimt.com/2014/07/05/remembering-the-importance-of-buying-local/

Would you believe we've sold over 500 dozen eggs since March? That's alotta eggs....

4. Joe's been killing it at the local farmers market. His baked goods are a HUGE hit! When we went to the local clinic today to get my surgery stitches out, no one really cared about my healing and recovery - the 2 doctors and the PA were more interested in Joe's hamburger buns and bread! Word apparently spread from another PA. Hellooooo! Patient in the room!!! Sheesh!! Tongue I'm really proud of him.

5. No Disney trips planned ATM. But give me time.

6. Oh, and we are moving back to the Bay Area. clapping The farm is up for sale and we are hoping to be back by end of August. Partly due to work and being recalled back to San Fran, but a few other factors weighed in the decision as well.

Hoping that once we get back to the Bay, things will slow down enough to get back to regular posting. It's always a breath of fresh air to come here and see what's going on and chat with some great peeps.

Hope everyone is doing well and planning or counting down their next trip!

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muchlove muchlove muchlove muchlove muchlove muchlove

~~~~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! JEFF !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!~~~~

Welcome back Home!!! clapping clapping

Miss Mikki's picture
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To steal a Disney resort phrase

"Welcome home!"

stars

Great to hear your updates. I have really missed your posts.

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Welcome back JeffC! stars
You're moving again? laugh

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yay clapping yay clapping
So nice to hear from you again Jeff!

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Wow, you've packed in a lot in the last year. Boo that the arm isn't fully healed yet - that must be a real pain. (pun intended. biggrin )

Another move? You guys must be experts by now! I don't know how you do it. At least you won't be waist deep in snow this winter. Good luck, and don't forget to check in every now and then and let us know how it's going.

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Time marches on. Eventually you realize it's doing it across your face.

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So good to hear from you Jeff. You have been missed. Wow 500 dozen eggs that's a lot of omelets. You and Joe are becoming experts in packing/unpacking.

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Hello to Mase and Jeff! I didn't know you from before but hopefully I will soon!

Big thanks from me to the moderators too. I can't imagine how difficult it must be! bighug

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Kristen, Mrhubs and the others have a difficult job but I am so glad that they keep this forum humming along. Thanks for your hard work it is greatly appreciated.

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muchlove (((((((((((((( JeffC ))))))))))))))) muchlove

Let's have cupcakes, school bread, zebra domes, and Karamel Kuche treats for everyone!!!

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Missed you guys, Mase and Jeff! Glad you're both doing well and back with us!